THE MEMOIRS OF SUMMER RAY

I must have 1,000 pieces of scrap paper that I have taken notes on, thrown around my office. I get these really good thoughts and ideas, and then I just let them lay. I know what I need to do, but doing it requires a lot of effort. So, I seem to give bits and pieces of my time, to different aspects of this project; books, marketing and finishing the 8th book, script, videos, fundraising, mood board, reading, studying, website and keeping up with our FilmFreeway profiles. I don’t know if I just get bored, or if I am just creating balance as everything needs to be done. Plus, I need to work on the Business Plan. I have no doubt about the success of the project. But pieces still need to be put into place. This isn’t something that I can just cram a piece where it doesn’t belong.

It is an incredibly huge project that only God can handle. Period! If I try to carry it on my shoulders, I absolutely start to sink, like I am in quicksand and I sink fast. It is a hard place to come back from and why I try to avoid the doubt and the, “What if’s?” But not seeing the finished puzzle, or how long it will take to finish it, is hard on me emotionally. But this is why we always need a reminder as to where we plan to be. For me, I am definitely buying an, “Oscar,” keychain. I do not care how “woke” Hollywood has become. The Academy is the focal point. I might not fit in, but I do not care. There are many likeminded actors and filmmakers in Hollywood, like Jon Voight for instance. Hollywood is the film capital of the world. It is a fact and not something I can turn away from. Maybe God wants our project right smack in the middle of it. I do not know. All I know is this. We must keep putting one foot in front of the other and not judge how bad off the world, the economy or Hollywood is. Our help comes from above. God will fund this film, His way. I do not know if that means investors. I do not know if that means donations. I do not know if that means I sell millions of copies of the book series – or all three, or two out of three. Right now, only God can see the means. But by faith, I can see that He will provide those means. But I still have to keep moving the project forward. Right now, I am in the process of working on the ten minute short to send to film festivals, (sneak peek) https://youtube.com/shorts/Iqip_nXsmZQ along with the script. But I am excited how this new video is turning out. Not once, have I grown tired of the story. I do get tired of the work. But never the story. I can feel the characters come to life, even just thinking about them. I do not know when production will start for the pilot. I just know it will. I do not know all the factors that God is aligning, or how He even plans for us to start production. I just know He will. I think that is half the battle because living by faith is hard. But when you know that God is honest, good and truth, you also know you can lean on Him to bring to pass what we need Him too.

The book tours; funding; marketing; short video; etc., all need to happen. They all feed on each other. Book tours promote the film. The video promotes the funding. It is all intertwined. My health has been a roadblock for sure. COVID unleashed its hell on me and I am still trying to find my way back. But I haven’t quit. I am still giving bits and pieces of my attention and time to this project. This project won’t be released too soon, or too late! Delay doesn’t mean anything! It just means that God has factored in all the pieces and in His sovereign timing, He will put this project together. When they ask me how? I will just answer, “God did it!” But I have to get organized and focused as I have to stop being so scattered. Right now, it’s the video and script – and getting ready for film festivals. It is exciting that we are able to even do that. We have certainly come a long way. I used to do blogs once or twice a week. I used to keep up with my skating journey. But my skating at the moment is ten minutes on ice, ten minutes on my CPAP, to help me breathe. But I am still skating and working on the program for the film. I haven’t quit that either. Things are slower than what I had hoped them to be. I certainly didn’t intend to take this decline in my skating level due to COVID. I certainly did not intend to see things (appear) to decline with the project either. But set backs – create something even better. With my skating, there is more definition, stretching, grace. Why? It’s because I didn’t have the energy to go fast. I am slowing getting it back. But in the meantime, I had to do something. So, I stretched. I watched ballet. I worked on my arms, etc., I hiked to build stamina. I did things that replaced, me not being able to skate for hours. With the video, I did things differently. I slowed the narrative. I added a few more finishing touches. I changed some of the music. Why? Because I had to. I don’t just want to be nominated – though nominations are absolutely awesome. But if at all possible, I want to win awards as they will also help to shed light on our project. It IS possible and I believe that!