THE MEMOIRS OF SUMMER RAY

Sometimes for whatever reason, we are forced to slow down and just go back to the basics. Being diagnosed with Post Covid Syndrome, it took a very bad toll me on both physically and mentally. There are days when I am just worn out from tying my laces. But I keep pressing through. It was shown on a Pulmonary Function Exercise test that I (not on purpose) hold my breath for too long. This isn’t something I am even aware of, until my brain alerts me that I need to breathe. I was intubated for sepsis pneumonia in 2016 and Covid made an already injured throat and airway worse.

So my options are, quit or keep skating. Well, quitting is absolutely out of the question. But how do I skate when just even tying my laces wears me out? I have had to learn the art of going back to the basics, slowing down and learning my body on the ice all over again. This was extremely difficult for me as my skating level dropped drastically. Or did it? Yes it did. But something wonderful came out of it. I was forced to work more on edges and precision. I was in desperate need of arm strength, because the PCS affects my arms if I over exert myself, to the point I can’t use them. But in working with my arms, I also decided on how to use them more fluently on the ice. So, I have been studying other coaches, skaters and doing a lot of off ice research on ballet, arm placement, and where my focus should be etc. Cathy my own coach, is breaking things down bit by bit simply because at times, I get overcome with brain fog and what used to make sense put together, now needs to make sense in parts.

But truly, it is making me a better skater overall. I now have to learn about my breathing on the ice. Breathing is a natural, involuntary thing to do. For me, at times, I just stop breathing and normally don’t even realize it. So, I also have to work with Physical Therapy and learn how to readjust my breathing, especially on the ice. Oxygen must get to where it needs to be, or I could pass out, fall or just continue to work harder, but with less traction. I don’t expect to film my part of the skating scene in the pilot, until Christmas of 2024. But I do not know the logistics of the SAG or Writers Guild (WGA) strike and long it will last. I do not know when we will have our funding and how God will provide it. But till then, I have to keep working what I know to work. We might not film my scene until Christmas of 2025. I honestly do now know. But I am excited to keep pressing forward and getting this program where it needs to be, and the best part of all…we will get it there. I just have to keep reminding myself to take it one skating stroke at a time; or one stretch at a time; or even one arm reach at at time. I might not be happy about it and honestly sometimes I cry because it is so frustrating. But I am alive. I am still skating. I have an amazing coach. There is so much talent and knowledge to research that is helping me. Perhaps, I wouldn’t have take this road, if the PCS wasn’t an issue. I can only say that I am truly thankful that at this point in my skating journey, I am doing exactly what I need to be doing to make me a better skater overall!